Llamas running down the road!

I’m peacefully sitting in my office with my pups, when they jumped up and started to bark like there’s something going on that I should be aware of. So I got up, looked out the window and saw Sweetie our llama trotting down the road. Really? A llama on the run? Where’s that pig! I run to the door tripping over a dog and a cat or two who is screeching over a stepped on tail. Super Farmer was out there already in his suit and tie herding not one, but two llamas back towards the farm.  You see, he left for work and was halfway down the road when a nagging thought came to mind…’did that gate shut behind me?’ He turned around and raced back home to find Sweetie munching on the lush green grass in our neighbor’s yard. Violet was standing in the road trying to decide which yard to attack first. He stopped his car in the middle of the road, jumped out and went after the nearest llama. Well, llamas don’t like it when you move quickly towards them, they go into flight mode. So off they went in the opposite direction! I cant go out there because I’m still in my red puppy dog robe and pink minion slipper socks (so much for a PJ work morning)…I have to draw a line somewhere you know! I’ve already had strangers watch me dance with a donkey, chase pigs, hide behind my Jeep in my robe spying on animals, stand on my front porch in my robe taking pics, sing to llamas, run around with a goat behind me to get exercise, have melt downs in the middle of the pasture where I stomp my feet, waving my arms…well, you get it. I am NOT going to run down the street in a red puppy dog robe behind Chad who is in a suit and tie, chasing a llama! Nope, ain’t gonna do it! He was on his own!! He came back (without a llama), threw the trash can lid open, dug through the trash to find an empty sweet grain bag to trick those llamas into thinking he had a treat for them! Back out to the street he went to get his girls!  One thing about 99.9% of farm animals, if they  see a bag or cup of grain, they will follow you anywhere! It worked! Sweetie came galloping back with Violet a hoof or two behind her! He led them back through the gate, threw the bag down and let them attack it. I clapped and told him what a good Super Farmer he is, he glared at me without answering, waved to the nice man in the truck who was forced to stop as the Addie circus  performed live before his very eyes, letting him know that it’s now safe to drive again.
At the moment, all is back to normal…whatever that is.


Brave hen!

In this high wind, the chickens will stay inside the barn watching the world blow by. As they line up just inside the door silently looking out, I can just imagine what’s going on inside those tiny bird brains. This song comes to mind, chicken style…’I want to fly like an eagle to the yard…I want to fly like an eagle, let this breeze carry me…to the pasture…the humans back door…the bush…the trees! I want to fly like an eagle!’ Every now and then, one of those hens will sing that song to the point where she actually believes it! She waits for the next gust, steps outside, flaps her wings like there’s no tomorrow, and flys…sorta. For a brief second, she will soar through the air, wings spread out, head held high, her beady little eyes closed! She is an eagle…a real bird! Then she thuds back onto the hard ground, she gets up, fluffs up her feathers, shaking it off. The brave little hen proudly holds her head up, struts back to the barn where the other chickens welcome back their hero with feathered high-fives!

Dances with pigs

Oh my gosh, I almost made a spectacle of myself in public! Remi was waaaaaay in the back field so I called her while standing in the front pasture, by the road, in daylight, in the middle of the day. She was happy to see me standing there with a cup of grain in my hand and came running as fast as her short, stubby little legs (that I still cant figure out how they support her weight) could go with her tail wagging, making snorting and grunting sounds that only a pig could make.  So, to show her how much I was happy to see her too. I did a little jig with my arms outstretched singing out her name. I was about 30 seconds into my farm dance when I realized, ‘hey! I’m outside…by the road’!! I stopped and quickly looked around to see if there was a traffic jam in front of the house with stopped cars and folks filming the crazy farmer lady who dances with pigs! Thank goodness nobody was there!
Remi caught up to me, nudged my leg with her piggy snout, looking up at me with adoring, I-love-you-so-much eyes…OR she was gazing at the cup of grain, daydreaming about golden pieces of food falling into her open mouth in slow motion!

The cookie thief

This is so funny! I gave Remi Doodles a cookie for a treat. One of the turkeys ran up, grabbed it out of her chewing mouth and ran with it towards the barn. The pig stood there for a few seconds with a stunned look on her face…then she took off after the turkey who made a right turn and flapped towards the front pasture with the treat hanging out of her beak where Dunkay was standing watching the show. The pig caught up with the feathered fiend who dropped the yummy morsal. BUT, before the pig could gobble it up, the donkey galloped over and snatched the cookie a mere inch away from the pigs snout! Dunkay ate it without chewing as poor Remi stood there looking up at the cookie thief snorting. I scolded Dunkay but I could tell he didn’t care. He strutted past the unhappy, snorting pig with a smuged look on his face. I patted Remi on the head telling her sorry.

Scooter and a trash can

Okay this was funny.   The neighbors  to our right have a very long driveway since their house sits waaaaaay in the back. The 4 llamas were sitting, not standing,  in the field next to each other facing their driveway. I’m always watching them out the window to make sure everyone is behaving themselves and for amusement…you never know when they’re going to put on a show! Today it was show time!
I could see that they were looking at something, so of course I go out and hide behind the Jeep in my red puppy dog robe.  I want to see if it’s  the gentleman with his fluff balls in the matching purple sweaters, the jogger in pink or something else I need to worry or laugh about.  Well, today it was our neighbor waaaaay behind us. They have some kind of scooter thingy that he stands on. He puts his can on the front, stands behind it and down the driveway he goes! The llamas are curious little buggers and watched him going down the driveway on his scooter with his garbage container! It was so funny! All four heads moving from right to left  watching a man and his trash can on a scooter! I swear I’m going to get cameras put up all around this farm! Four llamas…a man on his scooter with a trash can and me in a red puppy dog robe with minion slippers outside couching behind a Jeep peeking my head around it watching llamas watch the guy on his contraption!

Pig chases llamas…again

These animals never cease to amuse me! I was watching them through the window doing a head count because you never know when one might jump the fence to freedom for the neighbors yard. I could see the llamas in the back pasture briskly walking towards the barn. And why were they half running towards the front? Remi Doodles took a stroll out to say good morning! They don’t want to socialize with a pig. So I grabbed my camera, and filmed them coming in. Of course I was in my red puppy dog robe and tried to hide behind the Jeep. I don’t want to blow up Facebook by being seen doing weird things like standing outside in the cold in a bright red puppy dog robe with pink minion slipper socks filming animals and talking to a pig!

The cars that slow down.

Today I’ve been putzing around in the barn, pastures, yard…cleaning up, rearranging…you know, farm stuff. I always make sure Dunkay and the llamas know that I am always watching them by pointing two fingers at my eyes then pointing towards them. Its a weird habit I developed almost 9 years ago. Well, I noticed that I am now doing it to Remi, more than Dunkay! I always wonder if folks think I’m weird when they drive by and see me doing my ‘I’m watching you so NO funny business’ gesture to all animals that are within eye site. Once in awhile, they see me doing my gesture as I stomp my feet in frustration! I just can hear in my head the type of conversations going on inside the cars slowly driving by.

Person one: “oh look honey the animals are out by the road.”
Person two: “yeah they are, slow down so we can see them!”
Person one: “oh goody! The crazy lady is out there with them! Maybe she’ll do something weird again!”
Person two: “oh I hope so! Remember when she was chasing that pig around as the donkey followed her?”
Person one and two are now laughing.
Person one: “hey kids, look up, its that funny farm again!”
Two little faces are plastered to the glass.
Kids in unison: “slow down! We see that funny lady running towards the barn! Oh look the donkey is running too!”
Person two: “Yes! She’s out! STOP the car! Where’s my phone?! I gotta film her!”

Yep…that’s how I picture conversations going on in the cars that are crawling past the farm! I think we’ve made more necks strain sideways and backwards than our hens have laid eggs!