SHE IS FREE AND WILD AS LONG AS I FEED HER!!
If you are a true farm woman, it is impossible to get fat! I was out in the barn, field and yard today for an hour and a half, climbing hay stacks, moving bales, filling up animal water bins inside the barn. I did my grain dance with the circling goats and horses. I then emptied out the turtle shaped sand box that the quackers use for a pool, rinsing it out as my impatient ducks flapped and squawked at me the whole time. I climbed over a bunny fence, taking part of it down to make their pen bigger. I swept, then hosed off the back porch from duck poop. I searched for eggs with Dunkay (only found 5..dang hens are getting sneaky again). I chased Llamas out of their pen into the back pasture so I could close it up and let chickens out to enjoy some fresh air and peck at the brown grass. I carried 2 large arm loads of hay to put out for the Llamas and the best exercise of all….I saw Dillon running towards the garage so I sprinted from the middle of the yard to beat him there. I just fed the kitties and left the door open because I wasn’t done with my cat chores when I saw him do a bee-line for the opening! Ha! I beat him! I got there 2 seconds before he did and I loudly said to him, “I win, you lose, no kitty food for you!!” He grunted at me and walked away to see if he could get into the bunny pen for rabbit pellets. Tonight, I’m going to be lazy and herd everybody back into the barn with my Jeep, window down yelling “YEE HAAAW!!..ROLLEN ROLLEN ROLLEN KEEP THEM DOGGIES ROLLEN, RAW HIDE!!”
Ah the joy of winter…lots of snow with high winds that make the below freezing weather feel like the North Pole on a warm day! Then there is the morn, afternoon and evening ritual. I put on my pink Carhart jacket with matching pants, hat and gloves, pink rubber boots that go up to my knees with the little brown horse’s on them, a scarf to wrap around my face 4 times and a prayer on my lips. I fight my way to the barn as the biting wind slams tiny ice particles onto my exposed face I couldn’t cover. On the way to the barn I repeat to myself, “I love these animals, they are worth the effort, it’s good exercise”. I then proceed to push a horse or a donkey (usually both) away from the barn door so I can get in without slipping on the ice. My favorite word is now being heard by all…”NO” or “stop it”. The animals are now circling the feed bag, some grunting, some stomping and a few nips at each other! Then there is little ol me, in the middle trying to formulate an escape plan in case they go to war. I hand out food rations which is never enough, I sneak to the hay bale before Dunkay gets there and throw little piles of hay everywhere so they all think they have their own food that nobody else can see! I let out a huge sigh of relief because I just survived another feeding. Now it’s time for the chickens and the black bunny who lives with them, helping to keep the eggs warm. And the ducks? They are in the yard quacking making hundreds of snow trails from the back porch to their shelter waiting for me to fight my way to them,unhappy because I didn’t feed them first.
My animals love me so much they are singing me a song! First Dunkay does his louder than a jet plane HEEE-HAAAAW and the goats who are standing beside him, staring at the house of course, do their high pitched BAAAAAAAA…then Dunkay hollers again, followed by a rooster. The only thing that would make this choir perfect, is if the Alpaca would do his alarm call! Now that would be farm sweet music!!! I gotta get cameras up!!
Today, I got home from the store and was taking my many sacks of groceries into the house when I felt a bump on my leg as a black and white furry blob brushed past me into the house. The stupid goat wanted to see my kitchen and demand food! I had to quickly put my sacks down on the floor where they don’t belong and began yelling my favorite animal word, “NO”! She turned around and blinked at me with a confused look on her face. “Helloooo….this is MY space, not yours…now, OUT”. Lucky for me, all the animals know the word OUT! She trotted past me as I held the door open with my arm out stretched pointing to the outside world. She put her head high in the air, strutted her stuff, knowing that she is the only barn animal who has successfully made it inside the humans ‘forbidden zone’.