Stink bug in church

Okay…I’m not making this up. We visit a friend’s church and I’m enjoying the worship. Half way through the first song, I feel something crawing up my back, inside my sweater. I just know its a stink bug. I’m in a dilemma. Do I jump up and scream which is my first impulse. Do I take my hand and try to swat at it behind my back making my arm bend backwards in a way it wasn’t designed? Do I take my sweater and flap it like I’m super hot. Do I tell chad and have him swat me on the back to kill it (I squashed that idea fast, I don’t want to have stink bug guts on my skin). Or do I excuse myself and go to the restroom so I can take care of my little problem. I did all of it. When it was all said and done…I smelled like a stink bug and it was laying on my seat on its back, his little legs running through the air. Chad pick up my tiny nightmare and walked him outside as I shyly said I’m sorry to all the now shocked people behind me who moved to other seats because it smelled like a stink bug.


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