Turkey in the fence

It’s going to be one of those days!

I went out to feed the dingbats and of course Biscuit goes with me. As most of you know by now, BOB our tom turkey hates Biscuit…not a dislike, not him viewing him as an annoyance…but hates.

I walk to the fence with my overflowing cup of scratch grain hoping to feed a few birds before Remi the not-so-small, nor petite, potbelly pig gets wind that yummy grain is flying through the air!

Well BOB sees the large black dog and instantly goes into attack mode. There’s a small problem though…he has to half jump/fly over a fence.
So BOB takes off like a Delta! He’s running, flapping as fast as his drum sticks can go and soars through the air over the fence! But poor BOB doesn’t quite make it. His foot gets stuck in one of the top holes.
So…I have this huge turkey hanging upside down with his foot stuck in the fence…Biscuit is barking at the bird in defiance and Gooble Gobble is freaking out because her man is hanging upside down mere inches away from a Pitbulls mouth! At first I stand there in disbelief thinking…’really’!? How am I going to get this 35lb turkey free from this metal fence trying to peck at Biscuit who is teasing him, being smart enough to keep a 1/2 inch away from his non stop open close, open close beak?

I look around willing Super Farmer to magically appear to save me from this farm drama!! But no, my hero is working and I have to save BOB all by my little lonesome!
I grab my turkey and hold him up as far as I physically can to get his leg in a better position to easily slide out. I’m sorry, did I say ‘easily slide out’? Hahahahaha! Riiiiiiiight!
Nothing is ‘easy’ on this funny farm!
His leg did not just ‘slide out’ like my mind told me it would! It was wedged in there…of course!!
So now I’M freaking out because I’m afraid his leg is going to break and we’ll have to put him down. Not my BOB! 😢
So Nancy is holding this large, heavy turkey up above the fence line trying to get his leg unstuck! The llamas see me at the fence and come trotting over in case I have a snack for them. Remi is already there weaving her fat little body through and around, the chickens are squawking because BOB is, the dog is acting like a mexican jumping bean and Dunkay has his nose in the gate opening, pushing at it because he thinks it’s his only chance to escape for the week! I’m frustrated that I can not get this bird leg free, as 3 llamas, 1 alpaca stand there watching in amusement at the circus performance that they for once, are not the main act!
In desperation, I loudly say, “God I need help!”
Within 10 seconds, his leg was free! Thank you Lord! I carry my still snapping at the dog turkey to the one gate that Dunkay is not working on, and open it up to get my ding bat bird back where he belongs!
I was so happy to see him walk and not limp! I turned to my audience of four legged creatures and told them that the show was over…go away! They lowered their furry heads as if the say, it wasn’t that much fun anyway, and galloped towards the back pasture to see what Laci our mini tank was chewing on as Dunkay kept pushing the gate like a mechanical robot!

I swear this stuff only happens to me!!


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